tag:sibuor.com,2005:/blogs/performances?p=2My blog and latest news2024-01-20T10:04:08+00:00Sibuorfalsetag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/73346592024-01-20T10:04:08+00:002024-01-21T18:21:49+00:00all the news for January 2024<p>So I’m back in London.</p><p>I cannot believe how quickly the time has gone. Wasn’t it only yesterday that I was boarding a plane to South Africa?!?!</p><p>This sabbatical was EXACTLY what I needed. I've come back to the Big Smoke with clarity and a renewed sense of purpose and perspective. </p><p>My creativity and energy are rejuvenated.</p><h4>Seeing my parents</h4><p>The most important reason for my going back home was to see my parents. I’ve become acutely aware of how much relationships mean to me and that I must make the time and space to nurture them. I’m like a Victorian dandy like that. Money means almost nothing to me.</p><p>Ma and paps, I know you’re both reading this and I love you both very much. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me! 😘</p><h4>Seeing South Africa</h4><p>Another important reason I wanted to take this break is that I wanted to see South Africa again and spend time doing the things and in the places that I love. Cape Town, the Karoo, St. Lucia, and the Drakensberg. It was magical. Especially places like the Karoo. I am a massive fan of the dry country and regularly entertain fantasies of living there.</p><p>I was foolish though to think that letting go of these places, once it came time to leave, would be easy. Honestly, it has left me more confused about where home is for me. Before I left London, it was crystal clear that London is home. Now, sitting in -5 degree temperatures, I find myself missing South Africa and its wonderful energy. Sigh.</p><p>I don’t know if I’ll ever find resolution on where home is for me. But what I’ve realized is that this is just something that I have to learn to live with.</p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/d2207565ab0581708168ffc89598cf6cca473f46/original/true-4.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>The river that we played in as children. Durban, 2023.</i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/b2aa0e30ee9576c886e0a128ff56ef8107051d7b/original/true-8.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>A baby monkey in the Frangipane tree outside my parents' kitchen window. Durban, 2023.</i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/e7c6ac6e97e85565f9bc9c3a4771207adc4a2d49/original/true-15.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>In the Drakensberg, cows have right of way. Drakensberg, KwaZulu-Natal, 2023.</i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/4e35e36203867450db06acad4f88c111b040bae1/original/true-12.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>A mountain valley. Drakensberg, 2023.</i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/6d91386d30558de72cef5bd4906b331d028aa4ec/original/true-16.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>A stunning Bushman rock painting of a shaman in a trance. The bubble shapes along their body suggests the trance. Giant's Castle, Drakensberg, 2023. </i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/ff12b33fa7b567b1a72bf61b81842af1f678b3b7/original/true-11.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>A river in the 'Berg. 2023.</i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/5c701acbf83b399242de23c371a1a78a451a818e/original/true-9.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>The Karoo desert. 2023.</i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/5f46a389a45adec6fd4d226ba4ad71f3e7ad96fe/original/true-13.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>The Karoo desert. 2023.</i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/17b83d061b9063939f7c843fb1abbbf26195d812/original/true-7.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>The Karoo desert. 2023.</i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/1276bca41296cdb90da4c100c9a196869acc79a8/original/true-2.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>The Karoo desert. 2023.</i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/74549292fffe5bfe96f62ee7ceb4c1964fd662cc/original/true-5.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>Table Mountain, Cape Town, 2024.</i></p><p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/s:bzglfiles/u/259264/0aa7ce6f321f94a02d44e72a0a27d9165f9af8e3/original/true-14.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" /></p><p style="text-align:center;"><i>A hippo at St. Lucia in KZN, Christmas Day, 2023.</i></p><h4>A new beginning!</h4><p>On a happier note, I’ve started a new job! In the music industry as well! I’m working as a part time communications assistant for a music company and I’m really loving it. The people are great, the work is meaningful, and it is so lovely to be working with creative people again. I love working from home, but doing it all the time? No. This job is two days a week and that’s perfect for me.</p><p>I’ll need to find additional work though……..</p><h4>…Patrons</h4><p>I realized in SA that I need creative freedom and that I don’t want to be under the pressure that would come of having a recording contract. Building up patronage for my music is perfect for this and is what I want to focus on building up for 2024. I already have a small base of loyal patrons for which I am super grateful. So I’ll be putting a lot more thought and work into growing this. Currently I’m offering <a class="no-pjax" href="/early-access-to-songs" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Early access to songs">early access to my new songs</a> and <a class="no-pjax" href="/special-mentions" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Special mentions">special mentions in my music videos</a>. I plan on building up my offering as I grow my patronage.</p><p>…</p><h4>…Gigging</h4><p>I’ve also been giving a lot thought to trying my hand at gigging. I enjoy playing covers, you learn a lot from playing other people’s songs, and I’m good at it.</p><p>I had every intention of learning my gigging repertoire while in South Africa. I managed to get a couple more songs under my belt, but not as many as I intended. I was torn between applying for jobs and re-skilling when, really, I should’ve been solely focused on learning my repertoire.</p><p>The clarity that I now have has only recently come to me. I was all over the place during the first couple months in SA. I’m learning to be gentle with myself about it this. Prior to getting this job I was pretty stressed about finding work and that anxiety distracted me. I’m a lot more chilled about work now, so I’ll focus on learning more covers once I’m settled in so that I can start pimping my piano out to pubs and bars.</p><p>I recorded snippets of Crocodile Rock and Another Love while in SA. I’ll record better videos soon.</p><div class="video-container size_m justify_center" style=""><iframe data-video-type="youtube" data-video-id="S-0pNPbi0iE" data-video-thumb-url="" type="text/html" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/S-0pNPbi0iE?rel=0&wmode=transparent&enablejsapi=1" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe></div><h4> </h4><div class="video-container size_m justify_center" style=""><iframe data-video-type="youtube" data-video-id="5ObT8Gc2C7g" data-video-thumb-url="" type="text/html" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/5ObT8Gc2C7g?rel=0&wmode=transparent&enablejsapi=1" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe></div><h4> </h4><h4>London Town</h4><p>I finally found a way forward to write the lyrics for London Town. Up until recently, I had been battling to write them because I didn’t have a very clear idea of what the song is about. Having a clear idea is CRITICAL for me to write lyrics.</p><p>I’ve had the musical idea for London Town for a while now. Initially, I focused on my struggle with living in London. However, as I started feeling like London is home, I realized that I didn’t want to focus on this anymore. I want to tell a more nuanced story about my life in London and the music I had already written for it just was not lending itself to that. But how?????</p><p>One day while in SA, I was talking to my dad a realization hit me: the thing that made London feel like home for me was when I finally made a friend. London is hard, frightening, and cruel. But it’s also immensely creative, vibrant, free, and fun. </p><p>I figured out that the way to capture this – having a friend in London –, with gentle honesty, could be perfectly told through a fictitious encounter between myself and a kind old man in one of my favorite coffee shops in London. </p><p>This stranger is an old man who moved to London decades ago to make it in music. He too struggled, but what he eventually learned, through significant toil, is that the way to truly make London home is by having a friend. </p><p>I was floored. And the lyrics have just fallen onto the page like meat off the bone.</p><p>I was sitting in a coffee shop in Cape Town recently and was about to pay and leave when an old man walked in and sat down. I couldn't believe it. This was the old man from my song! I ran back to my table and frantically started taking notes about him – how he moved, held himself, his facial expressions, his hair etc. I love building character sketches for my songs and this guy gave me everything I needed to bring the old man in my song to life! The muse bit me hard!</p><p>I’ll need to write new music for it now as the music I had written for it doesn't work with this idea. But that’s piss easy for me thanks to my classical training. </p><p>Speaking of which…..</p><h4>Music theory, ABRSM exams</h4><p>I haven’t said much about this but I’ve been working through my grade 6 music theory and would very much like to do the exam this year. It’s going very slowly because I’m doing it in the little spare time that I have.</p><p>I’m doing it mostly because I love it. A lot of it is not necessary for writing popular music. But I’m a music theory nerd. I’ve also realized that my musical creativity needs that kind of structure to flourish. It helps me find creative path ways to explore, get lost in, and most importantly, find my way out of.</p><p>I’ll also hopefully be doing my grade 6 piano practical exam later this year. As with theory, it’s slow going. I also just love it. It not only helps me become a better pianist, but it also help me write better songs because I can physically do more with the piano.</p><p>Anyway, that was a long letter. Im back in London. I’m focusing on settling in this week and not freezing to death.</p><p>I’m really going to try and make some giant leaps for humankind in my music career this year and I promise to keep you all updated.</p><p>Thank you as always for your support.</p><p>Sibuor</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/73087782023-11-24T14:57:00+00:002024-01-16T21:24:18+00:00Demo of London Town<p>I made a little recording of a song I'm working on about London. This is just the chords - I'm almost finished the lyrics and will record a video of me singing it later. I'm am soooooooo excited to share it with you! Let me know what you think!</p><div class="video-container size_xl justify_center" style=""><iframe data-video-type="youtube" data-video-id="BP8dmpylwYE" data-video-thumb-url="" type="text/html" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/BP8dmpylwYE?rel=0&wmode=transparent&enablejsapi=1" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe></div>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/71473982023-02-02T13:44:26+00:002023-10-16T16:00:55+01:00My next busking song: Another Love<p>I'm busy learning Another Love by Tom Odell. I recently discovered his music and really enjoy it. He's also got a career that I aspire to. He can do sell out world tours but is also relatively not that well known in the popular sense. </p>
<p>Another Love is one of his most famous songs. On my last day in Berlin last year, I heard a busker playing it and decided that I need to do so as well. I haven't been busking recently because, 1 it's frikken cold, 2 i want a break, and 3 I want to learn more songs. so I've been working on boosting my repertoire and this will be a great addition to it. I'll let you guys known when it's ready, which I'm hoping will be in a couple weeks.</p>
<p>Check it out below!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><iframe class="justify_inline" data-video-type="youtube" data-video-id="mE8l7RCodG8" data-video-thumb-url="https://img.youtube.com/vi/mE8l7RCodG8/mqdefault.jpg" type="text/html" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/mE8l7RCodG8?rel=0&wmode=transparent&enablejsapi=1" frameborder="0" height="180" width="320" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe></p>
<p> </p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/70247442022-07-27T15:56:21+01:002023-02-02T11:59:07+00:00Updated lyrics for Too Many Pieces<p>Too Many Pieces is coming along SOOO nicely. I added a double verse to the original lyrics and it flows much more smoothly now and tells a better story. I've also written a big chunk of the music, which I am so happy with. I feel like I'm becoming the songwriter that I want to be. You'll see what I mean when I release TMP.... WHICH WILL BE SOON! Just bear with me for now. Busking prep is taking up a lot of my time. But slowly slowly, bit by bit, all the pieces of my soul are coming back together I AM DOING GREAT!</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/249759d873eea10c76f4e33a8ba228dfdce0bbd5/original/img-3686.jpeg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/69b42f2f299be628a66f87c8ceb20090732fee6d/original/img-3687.jpeg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/c97338005086b1038b18df3f66037ed716fc4a85/original/img-3688.jpeg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/69951232022-06-16T12:07:42+01:002022-06-16T12:07:42+01:00Making music by hand<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/607becc875fc136895976514758dd80ea6f14cbc/original/tempimagedueb0t.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.png" class="size_m justify_center border_none" alt="" />I really, really, really, really enjoy writing music. The physical act of writing it. Putting pen to paper and watching the ink absorb and spread out into the paper in fine shards. </p>
<p>Writing music by hand is a much more fluid process for me than using a computer. When I use my laptop to write, I overlook tiny details that make a song work as a whole. I've seen images of Bach's music, I've seen Beethoven's sketchbooks for his ninth symphony, and I've seen video of Quincy Jones writing out his scores in a meditative state and have always wanted to replicate that. </p>
<p>Don't get me wrong, computers bring a lot to the songwriting process, everything from speed to experimentation. But, as I was writing out some ideas this week for Too Many Pieces, I noticed just how much foundational detail I missed. One has to really get into the weeds when writing by hand. </p>
<p>Writing by hand brings me so much closer to the raw material. You have to get deep into the lyrics, rhythms, melodies, and harmonies. Like a Renaissance painter, I have to mix the pigments and binders myself to get the colors I want. Writing by hand is much harder and frustratingly slow. </p>
<p>My hope though, is to be able to create something like the Mona Lisa, even if, like Leonardo, it takes me 30 years to make.</p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/69944562022-06-15T16:33:06+01:002022-06-15T16:33:06+01:00My performance outfits<p><iframe class="justify_inline" data-video-type="youtube" data-video-id="JW-yidluxSs" data-video-thumb-url="https://img.youtube.com/vi/JW-yidluxSs/mqdefault.jpg" type="text/html" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/JW-yidluxSs?rel=0&wmode=transparent&enablejsapi=1" frameborder="0" height="180" width="320" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe></p>
<p>IMAGINE THIS. Me at a urinal. Wearing a flowing Georgette pair of pants, a dusty pink t-shirt, and topped off with a light pink kimono. There’s a shuffle behind me. The syncopated sli-slishhh-sli-slishhh of a man who’s had too much to drink. A gruff cockney voice erupts from around me “blimey mate that’s a smashin’ outfit you’ve got on. At least you look different to the rest o’ us.” The his thick gnarly hands fumble at his zipper. He sighs, relieved and at ease with his manhood in hand. Excited & self conscious, I pee hard into the pear shaped bowl. And as little drops of pee ricochet out the bowl, like little wet sparklers, I suddenly realize, “yeah bitch, I wear what I like.” </p>
<p>And this is how and when I realized what my look for my performances needs to be. This is also a (badly lit) clip from my performance last night. but listen how they all stop talking and START SINGING ALONG WITH ME!!</p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/69942712022-06-15T09:38:08+01:002022-06-15T09:38:08+01:00North Nineteen gig review<p>I played at this awesome venue, North Nineteen, on Tuesday as part of the North London Open Mic night. I played all covers, Your Song, Cornflake Girl, and Tiny Dancer. AaaaaND I got to play on a rather handsome Nord piano that was DONATED to the venue! Omg! Do you know how much they cost?? Please can someone donate a Nord to me!!! I met and listened some great musicians and I really enjoyed playing for the audience - it was the loudest applause I've ever received! I'm really surprised at how supportive open mic audiences are. In my head, I always envision them slinging a beer bottle at me and me launching myself into the crowd and getting into a fight (umm...haha...). But I've never had an unsupportive audience yet. I'm gonna try and up my game to two open mics a week from now on (I work full time and need to do a ton of other things for my music career, so this is the most I can spare rn). I made a little clip of me playing. I recorded it on my phone so the audio isn't the best, but you can hear what you need to lol. Enjoy!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><iframe class="justify_inline" data-video-type="youtube" data-video-id="t1cYJFJ5cL4" data-video-thumb-url="https://img.youtube.com/vi/t1cYJFJ5cL4/mqdefault.jpg" type="text/html" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/t1cYJFJ5cL4?rel=0&wmode=transparent&enablejsapi=1" frameborder="0" height="180" width="320" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe></p>
<p> </p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/69850342022-06-02T15:56:50+01:002022-06-02T15:57:59+01:00Two more months until I start busking!!<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/c5de2bbc90ea656cf15f80c591c6705a05863d9e/original/tempimagehscwm0.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p>Hey! I've got two more months before I start hitting the road! Literally. I'm going to start busking in August and am working on my repertoire in the meantime. I've finished Tiny Dancer and will record a video of it in a week or two and send it to you. I like to give songs a few weeks to settle in once I've learned them. I find that they start sounding a lot more natural after I've given them a break. </p>
<p>Until then, I'm working on my next cover, Piano Man by Billy Joel. I've decided to start learning more songs by ear so that I improve my aural skills. I've been doing this with Piano Man and my inner music nerd is tickled pink. I can already see how its bolstering my own songwriting chops. </p>
<p>As I figure the music out, I also get to see how the song is put together. I read a story that Bach, Beethoven, Mozart etc all used to copy out other composers' music and that this helped them immensely to absorb different techniques. So I want to do the same. </p>
<p>It's quite slow, but I think it'll pay off in the end. You can see, in the image attached, that I work out which lyrics fall on the strong beats and then I start working out the rhythm (in music notation). </p>
<p>I've also gotten back into writing Too Many Pieces. I've finished writing the lyrics and vocal melody and am starting to write the piano section. Songs take me a while to write because I treat them like compositions. I like to learn and apply new techniques and also give my ideas a chance to develop. </p>
<p>I completed a songwriting course earlier this year, which has been so useful to me for thinking about how to write good harmony. I'm applying what I learned in that course to TMP. In fact, with each new song, I want to focus on learning something new and then apply that to my song. </p>
<p>I know I've been a bit quiet of late. I went to South Africa in April and it was divine. I really needed a break. In fact, I completely underestimated how much I need to take regular breaks and also just change up my scenery. Even though I didn't end up completely relaxing (in the Karoo), I did just enough to feel so creatively charged again. I'm already planning my next trip home. This time, to the Karoo! </p>
<p>I'll keep you updated on how my busking and new music goes! </p>
<p>Sibuor</p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/69676612022-05-10T14:22:48+01:002022-05-10T14:22:48+01:00Living for joy: notes on my trip to South Africa and return to London<p>I forgot why I am came to London. I came here to live for joy. I want to withdraw everything from life’s joy register. “I might not be rich for money, but I’m a millionaire. I debonair with no cares” sang a sultry singer once 😉. </p>
<p>But honestly, I’ve become tired. So damn tired. Immersed in exhaustion and worn out to my bones. Withdrawn and shriveled up. Large and fast-paced cities can tear strips from a person. </p>
<p>You see, I am a workaholic. This is the first time that I’ve said it without any overtones of pride. I work to blackout. More than any other addiction that I’ve been blessed with, this one, is moerse bitch. I work to avoid feeling the anxiety that plagues me. “You’re running out of time, falling behind, you’re wasting time, you’re going to end up under a bridge, you’re not doing enough, you’re almost 40 and you’ve fucked up, no money, no nothing...” </p>
<p>It’s quite simple: I use work to avoid these feelings. </p>
<p>During my first week in South Africa, I crashed. I had no routine, no schedule and it shook my inner world like a magnitude 12 earthquake. Routines are my guardrails. They’re the steel mesh fences keeping the wild animals at bay. Nasty beasts gnashing their teeth. The fences are control. </p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>What will happen if I lose control? Am I less of a person because I decided to check out of the rat race? Because I structure my day around doing what I want and not what someone else wants from me? If I could do whatever I want I would: be 100% unfocused. I would wake up, do a little work (to pay the bills, of course), read, play piano, learn something new and arbitrary (probably about renaissance music or British royalty), visit a coffee shop and talk to people, then people watch, What’s wrong with a life like this? I don’t owe society anything more than what I take from it. </em></p>
<p><em>What if I am happy just getting by? </em></p>
<p><em>Ah! What a thought. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>You’re a millennial. Check your phone. Check social media. </em></p>
<p>** Opens Instagram ** </p>
<p>!!!MUSICIANS EVERYWHERE DOING WHAT YOU SHOULD BE DOING!!! </p>
<p><em>Cue Britney Spears: you want to look hot in a bikini? You better work bitch! </em></p>
<p>AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! </p>
<p>** Hyperventilate ** </p>
<p>** Panic ** </p>
<p>** Stress ** </p>
<p>“Look,” says my mercenary ego with knife to my throat, “either you get on a damn plane and go back to the rat race or you enjoy the time off!” </p>
<p>Choice is so simple when the stakes feel overwhelming. And what choice did I have? I couldn’t afford to change my flight and I knew I’d be furious at myself. I chose to lean in to the moment and enjoy it (and keep off social media). </p>
<p>My final week in South Africa was just glorious. EXACTLY what I was craving: to feel joy again, to be curious by life, to have deep thoughts. My creativity was super charged. I reflected so much ON creativity. I found lost thoughts and ideas. Some of them just needed dusting off. </p>
<p>And so, I found some perspective. It’s funny how perspective changes everything. Allow me a moment of surrealism: I’m holding on for dear life to a horse, petrified and hurtling towards a cliff. Obviously I can see this. A random pterodactyl swoops in from nowhere and grabs me, lifts me up a little (and keeping up with the horse). I look down and realize, OH SHIT! I am NOT the horse. Then the lizard-bird drops me back onto the horse and pisses off back 65 million years ago. I gently put my arms around the panicked horse and whisper in its ears “whoa boy, whoa. It’s OK.” </p>
<p>Did you know that the silence of nature cleanses the ears? I’m telling you! It does! I discovered this whilst visiting a friend who lives on a fruit farm far outside of Cape Town. So much noise had accumulated in my ears from London that I couldn’t hear my own thoughts anymore. So the silent choir of fruit trees sang to me so sweetly that the gunk and grime clogging my ears just fell out. </p>
<p>So now I’m back and what do I do with all this perspective? </p>
<p>Well I’ve come to realize a few things. </p>
<p>I accept my inner world and all its turmoil. I can’t always explain it. I don’t mean any harm by it. They’re there and they impact me so much. Regardless, I am not a bad person or a failure. </p>
<p>I’m doing the best that I can in a world that actually wants me to be a mediocre human being so that it can exploit me and sell meaningless shit to me. And I’m doing this sober, which is quite something. I made mistakes and that’s OK. I’ve mostly done the work necessary to forgive myself so that I can focus on the present moment. </p>
<p>Most importantly, I DO NOT want to write shit music. Learning techniques and ways to not write shit music takes a lot of time and energy. </p>
<hr><p>Home always felt so far away.</p>
<p>But lately, it feels closer. </p>
<p>Only seeing the massive grin on my face when I arrived in Cape Town could do justice to express how happy I am in Cape Town. </p>
<p>There really is something magical about the mountain. </p>
<p>It gathers all time towards it. </p>
<p>My heart is in South Africa and my life is in London. </p>
<p>For now that is. </p>
<p>I came here to live for joy </p>
<p>And ended up working for fear </p>
<p>I remember now. </p>
<p>I am addicted to my thoughts </p>
<p>This must change. </p>
<p>In August I will start busking and will take another step closer to doing what I enjoy: more than anything, I love performing and making people happy. </p>
<p>I’ve also just finished a course on music composition and will apply what I’ve learned to my next song, Too Many Pieces. </p>
<p>I’ve come away from South Africa feeling spiritual (even though I don’t believe in spirits). </p>
<p>I’ve climbed out that pothole in a puddle and a puddle in a pothole. </p>
<p>I am addicted to my thoughts. </p>
<p>That doesn’t make them real. </p>
<p>Remember that. </p>
<p>I want to work to chase joy. </p>
<p>I want to live for joy.</p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/69342342022-04-02T23:37:31+01:002022-04-02T23:41:16+01:00Notes on seven months of sobriety<h4>Waking Up on a Hotel Room Floor in Manchester </h4>
<p>29 August 2021. 6am. Wake up. </p>
<p>WTF? I’m on the floor. </p>
<p><strong><span class="font_large">DOOF DOOF DOOF.</span></strong> Last night's party's still going on. Please kill that beat!!!! </p>
<p>Ugh my head! Lord have mercy on me. </p>
<p>Sigh. </p>
<p>"am I in a brothel or a hotel?"</p>
<p>Jesus this place is ugly. Booking.com did a number on me!</p>
<p>Turn over. </p>
<p>Breeeeath. Stare at the ceiling. </p>
<p>Right. If it's the last thing I do, I’ve got to get away from this non stop banging. I need to go home. now. I will not die in a hotel room!</p>
<p>Water. Gulp. Gulp. Gulp. Ah! </p>
<p>Food/Salt/Grease/Black coffee/Anything to be honest. 👄 🥘 🤤 </p>
<p>"ok. you're not dead."</p>
<p>Dragged myself to the train station without vomiting all over Manchester city center. </p>
<p>I picked the wrong train. WHY???? HOW??? Of all the trains to pick in this moment, I picked the (doof doof doof) one with longest trip back to London. 3 hours of dehydrated thudding ag-o-ny. Try not to projectile vomit on the lady eating her egg mayo sandwich in front of me. </p>
<p>Finally. Home. My hangover routine hasn’t changed, even after 100 days of sobriety. Get soup, chocolate. Slurp slurp slurp. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. </p>
<p>zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz(doof doof doof)zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz (doof doof doof)</p>
<p>Next day. thank fuck. ok. time to think,. </p>
<p>What happened?? How could I do this to myself? 100 days of sheer bliss and I top it off by doing the one thing I absolutely should never do again.</p>
<p>zzz</p>
<p><span class="font_small">(doof doof doof)</span></p>
<p>I must have had about two bottles of wine over the course of that day and night. Honestly, I have no idea. I didn't even look at my bank statement. couldn't deal with the horror. All I can remember is being at my aunt and uncle's 50th anniversary, little bits and pieces of being back in Manchester, and then waking up in the whorehouse of a hotel i was staying in.</p>
<p>Aside from the physical agony, spent the next 3 weeks recovering emotionally and psychologically. am not being hyperbolic here, but <span class="font_small">(doof)</span> CLAUSTROPHOBIAANXIETYDEPRESSIONLETHARGYCONFUSION. it was my condition for 21 days. </p>
<p>20</p>
<p>one</p>
<p>days.</p>
<hr><p>I put up with this shit for 20 years??????? NO wonder i became a nihilist.</p>
<p>my sssslittle...slip, shall we call it, was rather illustrative. I'd tasted sobriety and now I also had a reminder of what alcohol does to me when it's inside me. </p>
<hr><p>The choice was stark and bare. Black or white darling, no greys. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Something in me snapped in those three weeks like a brittle ruler. I was shattered and there was no putting me back. I'd gone up and down that measuring stick of insanity and now it was well and truly broken. Going back to booze is just not an option for me. </p>
<p> </p>
<h4>Adonis. Adonis </h4>
<p>1 January 2022. I love the underbelly of life. Loves it. I get electrocuted with joy and elation when I read Marxist literature and party in the bowels of london. Those are my kinks.</p>
<p>I'd heard about this fabulous queer party called Adonis.Adonis and decided to check out what was supposed to be their final party (it wasn't, naughty! 😡). I hadn't had a drink since that abominable evening back in Manchester on 29 August.</p>
<p>To be honest, I was rather nervous about going. Parties like these...well, parties in general, are associated with wine for me. lots of it. Understandably, i was apprehensive. </p>
<p>However, their marketing had me and I decided to check it out. </p>
<p>The funny thing is is that once I decided I wasn't going to drink; once I walked into the venue, stared down a bottle of wine and asked for a soda water, my apprehension just went away and I knew I would be alright. </p>
<p>I pushed through those big black doors and was confronted with a sight: silhouette of hundreds of people dancing against a backdrop of red laser lights whizzing around, lighting up people's faces, bodies, COSTUMES! The sound was earthly and cellular. </p>
<p>Now, I am not religious. I'm not even spiritual. but I worshipped the DJ that night, completely 100% certifiably sober. </p>
<p>You need to understand, I thrive off rebellion and counter culture. This was everything I'd been craving in my life. </p>
<p>I danced and smiled non stop for three hours. I don't think there's a metaphor available in the universe to describe the elation I felt. All I can say is that I cried when I left and I cried several more times in the days after Adonis.Adonis. i was so happy.</p>
<p>This kind of high was totally alien to me. It abducted me and did all sorts of weird experiments on me and now I feel like one of those people running around talking about their encounter of the fourth kind and no one believes them. This was an encounter of the fucking 40th kind!</p>
<p>I knew, after 3 hours of dancing, I was satiated. Wanted more. But I didn't <strong>WANT!!! MORE!!!</strong> I didn't need it. I'd had enough and that was enough.</p>
<p>So I left.</p>
<p>went home.</p>
<p>Showered.</p>
<p>Walked the dog.</p>
<p>Lay on the bed.</p>
<p>Read a book.</p>
<p>Posted on Facebook.</p>
<p>Cried (with joy).</p>
<p>went to bed.</p>
<p>it was disorienting in how remarkably ordinary this was and yet so extraordinary in its newness to me. By this point, at any point in my drinking days, I would have been utterly blackout wasted and stumbling home to a world of agony. Yet, for the first time in my life, I could remember everything, savor the high (which lasted about a week), and wake up refreshed and rejuvenated the morning after. And the beat was still going on in my head (doof doof doof), bouncing and tribal.</p>
<p>This was far better than any booze ridden high I had experienced.</p>
<p> </p>
<h4>Death in sobriety</h4>
<p>My friend died two weeks ago. I was profoundly angry and, thanks to my sobriety, still profoundly present for it.</p>
<p>No amount of anger could change what has come to pass. Something in that brutal reality, like little flowers pushing through the cracks of cement made me realize that there was nothing I could do to bring my friend back. Nothing. And when I realized that, I let go. Yeah, something happened to me. we're just blobs of energy, here in one form and then we're not. </p>
<p>I don't need some grand narrative to make meaning for me, string all these empty cans and bottles together and make a nice jingly outfit with. I can perceive with such clarity and acceptance all the little pieces of reality that are connected, disconnected, jumbled, ended, not started, this way, that way and which have all that have coalesced into something that resembles my life. It's kind of like my writing style, broken and all over the place. </p>
<p>A lot of people experience anger, rage, and sadness in their early days of sobriety. i think it's because when we realize there's no going back, we have to say goodbye to a part of ourselves. to let a part of ourselves that once meant so much to us, die. it's sad. very. but you heal and discover and completely new person. </p>
<p>I experienced death in sobriety and I accept it. My friend's passing gave me a way out of that never ending loop of anger and rage. The death of my old self has given me a way out too. </p>
<p>Start. Something. New!</p>
<p>Catharsis. I love that word. Apt word for my life right now. Reality is much less rigidly defined now. it's more like a shimmer. silky. i'm ok with that. the sheet of silk that is my life constantly forms and reforms, ruffles, flattens. what's is a fold today is just a crease tomorrow; who knows and who cares anymore? I feel like I'm constantly in touch with reality now, even though I'm beginning to perceive it rather differently than previously. i'm totally enthralled by how strange it is. I'm so hyper aware that I will die one day and all that will remain of me is the choices I made. </p>
<p>Alcohol calcifies the parts of you that need to grow as a person. I want to make better choices. Can't do this when you're a pile of calcium stuck to the toilet bowl of life. The little particles that make up each of us crystalize like limescale when we drink. sobriety is a great delimescaler. FLUSH TWICE!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I've found a way to break the loop, the never ending merry-go-round. That song is tired now. </p>
<p>I can see in color now.</p>
<p>I am human again. </p>
<p>Life is not a GIF or a meme anymore.</p>
<p>A performance becomes reality. </p>
<p>Death is rebirth.</p>
<p>Now I have a chance at life.</p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/68828762022-01-29T11:13:20+00:002022-01-29T11:13:20+00:00My great start to 2022!<p>Happy new year! How has 2022 started off for you? </p>
<p>It's been an awesome start for me. First of all, I'm 5 months sober today!! 🥳 I really didn't think that I would be able to do it. But I have. And even though I have my moments when I hate it, I have to admit that the benefits of sobriety are worth it. </p>
<p>Secondly, I've booked some shows for you! <a contents="You can check them out here" data-link-label="Shows" data-link-type="page" href="/shows" target="_blank">You can check them out here</a>. There are a couple shows left for January. MAKE SURE YOU PUT THEM IN YOUR CALENDAR!! I've left some space open in February because I want to go home. I'll take my piano with me so I might add some shows in Cape Town and online ones.</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/136c30930819fe1956bf7313726be048a4068c37/original/screen-shot-2022-01-29-at-10-42-47.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" />August is when I decide whether to stay in London or go back home to my beloved South Africa and I want to make sure that I've given it everything I have. So I'm putting myself out there and it's paying off in bookings and exposure! </p>
<p>I'm also a lot more confident as a songwriter (thanks to sobriety). And with this new found confidence, I've been reworking an old song called Oliver. I am so happy with the result. I'm in the editing phase now, so it should be ready to send out in the next couple weeks. You'll hear the difference. Trust me. </p>
<p>I've finished the scratch track for Too Many Pieces, which is gonna be my next song for Songlines. I'm going to test out at open mics and am doing my first one tonight. I did a quick sound check of it before I performed at the Midnight Magic Festival on Thursday. <a contents="You can check out the sound check here." data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.instagram.com/tv/CZPxKkMDRC0/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link" target="_blank">You can check out the sound check here.</a></p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/6f4238b6f926f1ba2b2f2ddd6f48aed34c510984/original/screen-shot-2022-01-29-at-10-50-02.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/68359682021-12-10T08:35:58+00:002021-12-10T09:03:30+00:00My music career is taking off 🚀<p>So last Sunday night, <strong>I played my first professional gig. <img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/9627525f2efd090fc0eee36e6d4ae278cc0a7f80/original/tempimageqwwshp.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.png" class="size_m justify_right border_none" alt="" /></strong></p>
<p>Omg. I was so nervous that I was literally one massive drop of sweat and stress. </p>
<p>But... </p>
<p>It.... </p>
<p>Was... </p>
<p>STUNNNIIINNNG!!! </p>
<p>I am so happy with it and <strong>I’ve been booked for another bigger performance in February based on this gig!!!! </strong>🤓🤓🤓</p>
<p>Do you want me to notify you by email when I've got new gigs and performances? <span class="font_regular"><a contents="If you sign up to my mailing list (click this link), I'll alert you by mail." data-link-label="New shows alert - Mailing list sign up" data-link-type="page" href="/new-shows-alert-mailing-list-sign-up" target="_blank"><span style="color:#8e44ad;">If you sign up to my mailing list (click this link), I'll alert you by mail.</span></a></span><br><br> </p>
<p>It feels like my music career is finally taking off. I could not have don't it, first and foremost, without sobriety. I'm 104 days without a drink today. </p>
<p>About three weeks ago, I was feeling so overwhelmed and like there was a tornado in my head. I couldn't remember my songs and that ole friend of mine, doubt, was sitting on my shoulder. I remember putting my head down on my piano and repeating "i cant do this, i cant do this." </p>
<p>It's only through the clarity of mind that comes with sobriety that I was able to pull myself together and say to myself<strong> "you HAVE TO find a way through this." </strong></p>
<p>In my uber drive to the venue on Sunday afternoon, i had to fight back the urge to vomit 🤮. I was so sick with anxiety. the trip there was expensive enough so i didn't fancy having to pay to clean this guy's car 🥴. At the soundcheck, I had no idea what I was doing. I just acted like I knew what I was doing. Someone asked me if I had a "DI cable" to which I casually replied ugh, sorry I left mine at home...and I then turned to the guy I was chatting to to ask him WTF a DI cable is. </p>
<p>When the show began, the sound engineer bumped me up a slot without telling me, so I was rather shocked when he indicated to me that it's my turn to set up. FFFFFF******************!!!!!!! </p>
<p>But what an experience. WHAT AN EXPERIENCE! <strong>The crowd went nuts for my set!!</strong> It was incredible to see so many people completely enraptured by my performance. My performance literally came alive and its soul danced for everyone. </p>
<p>I was NOT expecting that. </p>
<p>I played all my songs (and a new one --<span class="font_regular"><span style="color:#8e44ad;"> </span><a contents="join my mailing list to get notified when I release it" data-link-label="New songs alert -- Mailing list sign up" data-link-type="page" href="/new-songs-alert-mailing-list-sign-up" target="_blank"><span style="color:#8e44ad;">join my mailing list to get notified when I release it</span></a></span> 😇) and one cover. It taught me a valuable lesson about being true to yourself. When I think back to my early career and how hard I tried to make my music sound commercial and fit in with what someone else told me I had to sound like. They just didn’t connect. Sunday night was a massive confidence boost for me that when i write songs that are meaningful to me, they connect with people. </p>
<p><strong>My next performance is online so that means you can all watch! </strong>It’s at the Planet Noise music festival on the Sessions platform (stage 2) on 31 December at 19.30 (UK time).<span class="font_large"> </span><span class="font_regular"><a contents="It's free of charge and you can get your ticket here." data-link-label="Shows" data-link-type="page" href="/shows" target="_blank"><span style="color:#8e44ad;">It's free of charge and you can get your ticket here.</span></a></span><span class="font_large"> </span>Please come through! I'd love to share that experience with you. </p>
<p>After that, I’m booked for 3 February. And that’s gonna be a big one. Seriously, come to london if you can! 😂 </p>
<p>What an amazing way to end of 2021 for me! I have a much clearer sense of what I need to do next year and I am going to give it my all. </p>
<p>I hope you have a restful December and a wonderful 2022! I know the start to my new year is gonna be kick ass! </p>
<p>Sibuor</p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/67883692021-10-27T17:49:04+01:002021-10-27T17:49:04+01:00Even Paul McCartney gets stage fright<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/96521d03fc0260b9946109974a055895a2203d8f/original/tempimageezj9xv.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.png" class="size_m justify_right border_none" alt="" />“Even Paul McCartney used to get stage fright!” My friend told me. I didn’t talk much about it to her, but I could see that she could see I was upset. Another disappointing performance. <strong><em>How many more must I go through?! </em></strong></p>
<p>I struggle with stage fright. You wouldn’t think it, but I do. Most people are confused when I tell them about how much I struggle with it. I am clearly extremely good at masking my nerves. it’s the same thing every time before I go on stage: my mind tries to run through the music, which is difficult to do this without an instrument at hand. And when I invariably can’t do it, I start panicking that I will forget the music. Panic takes hold and tensions builds in my forearms. Will my fingers remember what to do??? I try and stop myself from going down that thought experiment but it’s no use. My mind is battling itself. </p>
<p>A few years ago, I played Take 5 at a music recital. It’s demanding jazz piece. At home, I could play it at double speed without looking at the keyboard. There were about 200 people in the audience that night. 400 eyes were looking at ME. Pianos are savage beasts. Don’t be fooled by them. YOU have to learn to ride them, not the other way around. And you have to make peace with the fact that, at some point, they will throw you off. </p>
<p>I knew I was going to forget what to do when I got to the climax of the piece. Started playing. Things were going well. Grace and speed. Finger ballet! The invisible audience in my head were not impressed by this dance I put on for them and were setting a trap for me. Tension was building in me as I worked my way to the midsection. </p>
<p>It happened. I fell. I knew it. Obviously it happened. I blanked out and could not for the life of me remember what to do. The keyboard was a jumble of black and white rectangles that I could no longer read. Imagine not being able to read these words anymore. I must have sat for about 5 seconds in shock and confusion before I turned to the audience and sheepishly said “I’m so sorry, I’ve completely forgotten the music.” </p>
<p><span class="font_large"><strong>Cornflake Boy </strong></span></p>
<p>Live music is not about perfection, it’s about connection. All your technical skill and prowess is secondary to the connection you have in that moment with the audience. When I turned to the audience and explained what was happening, they understood and started clapping. You see, I was connected to them. Part of my performance that night was to freeze and tell the audience what happened. It could have been anything else…I could have sung the next part of the song and started clapping. Anything. </p>
<p>Mistakes are inevitable and are chances for you to connect with people. </p>
<p>Next time, this Cornflake Boy will keep performing. Live performance is one big fucking mistake made beautiful. It’s about preparation and then surrender to the moment. Surrender to the moment is where the magic happens. </p>
<p>Once your art is ‘out there,’ it is no longer yours. You don’t own or control it anymore. It belongs to the Furies. </p>
<p><span class="font_large"><strong>Pandora </strong></span></p>
<p>Sometimes I wish that I had never come to London. I miss that version of myself that didn’t know anything about living outside of South Africa. </p>
<p>How could I ever go back home and forget about what life in London offered? Would I be constantly comparing my life here to that in South Africa? Where is home for me now? If my parents come back to the UK, would I still go home? Where will I be buried when I die? These are where my thoughts are. </p>
<p>I was taught to play guitar by a legendary South African musician, Syd Kitchen. I admire Syd (he’s passed away now). I admire his commitment to what he wanted to do. He forgo the temptations of opportunities that brightly lit cities offers highly skilled musicians and stayed in eThekwini. </p>
<p>I look at so many South African artists with envy who are doing what they love from Mnzansi. At what point do I choose happiness over opportunity? I know that happiness is paramount and I made the choice to leave home with eyes wide open. </p>
<p><strong><span class="font_large">Fake Spirituality </span></strong></p>
<p>Alcohol made me feel intensely and deeply. I was constantly chasing that sense of connection. To what? I have no idea. I now see that it prevented me from feeling very much when I wasn’t having a drink. Alcohol gives fake spiritual experiences. I use “spiritual” with some discomfort. I can’t find a word to describe the category of feelings. But make no mistake, it has nothing to do with god. </p>
<p>I have very little desire to drink these days. I am very glad that it’s out of my life for now and I don’t even think about it that much anymore. I have so much catching up to do and healing from the damage that it did to me. Alcohol takes everything from you and gives nothing back. </p>
<p><strong><span class="font_large">Last but not least… </span></strong></p>
<p>…I have been booked for my first ticketed and paid-for performance! OMG. I am thrilled and terrified at the same time. It’s at Moustache Bar in London on 5 December. I’m working on some new songs to play and I will throw in a couple old ones. I have 25 minute set and will be performing for reals in front of about 100 people! </p>
<p>So things are finally kicking off for me!</p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/67631632021-10-01T16:38:50+01:002021-10-01T17:05:05+01:00I'm revamping and performing!<p>Hey! </p>
<p>How are you doing? I hope that you’ve been well since the last time we spoke! </p>
<p>I’m doing really well and I want to share some of that goodness with you ❤️ </p>
<p>All credit goes to my sobriety. Aside from a slip about a month ago, I haven’t been drinking alcohol since 20 May. I’m also trying to kick coffee, but that’s a whole other kettle of fish 🐠🐡 </p>
<p>How has sobriety helped me? Well, no more anxiety! I sleep so well! My moods are more even! My brain is focused like a laser beam! And all of these have helped me begin carving out a place for myself as a musician and develop the focus I need. Because of that, I have been able to write the kind of music that is meaningful to me. </p>
<p>So here’s what I’ve been up to: </p>
<p><strong>A revamped Oliver </strong></p>
<p>I’ve revamped an old song of mine, Oliver, which is also my favorite. Prior to rewriting it, it was half sketched and that was irritating me immensely because I couldn’t build the necessary muscle memory to improvise or help me out when I blanked out mid performance. I am so, so, so proud of Oliver and what I’ve been able to do with it. I’m busy practicing it at the moment to record and hopefully will have it released in the next couple weeks.</p>
<p><strong>I'm getting myself out there 🧜🏽♂️🕺🏾🎤 </strong></p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/726e19dd3bff272078c39dc1d2213026406b759c/original/07404b3c-c2b6-4a44-aa92-2d262743e75a.jpeg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpeg" class="size_m justify_left border_none" alt="" />I’m also able to focus my wee brain on performing and getting myself out there now that the lockdown has pretty much gone in the UK. I’ve done quite a few open mics over the past few weeks. I bought a keyboard that I can take to gigs and that has meant I can get to A LOT more performing opportunities. So I’ve dove right in. </p>
<p>Some of my open mics have gone extremely well. I did a performance a couple weeks ago where several people came up to me to congratulate me. I’m doing a collaboration performance in the next few weeks with one of the other performers from an open mic I played at a few weeks ago. I am so chuffed with myself. I’m still doing mostly covers as I build my confidence , which is my focus for now. I’m going to start doing more of my own material so that I can start building a performance strategy. </p>
<p>I did a performance at a queer music night, which was quite a learning experience. The lesson I learned is that I need to start checking out audiences before I perform so that I can make sure what I do resonates with them. For example, I played a Tori Amos song at this night and it was soooooo not the right audience. This was an audience that came to see LOUD, FIERCE queens, which Im not. Don’t get me wrong, people appreciated it, but I could tell that this was the wrong audience. Aside from that though, it was ALOT of fun. </p>
<p><strong>Back to Songlines -- Too Many Pieces 🎼🎹 </strong></p>
<p>I’ve also gotten back to Too Many Pieces (part of my Songlines album). Thank the lord! It’s quite a fun song about a topic that I think will resonate with a lot of people — giving too much of yourself away to others. I’m taking it easy with this song because Oliver was quite an intense writing experience. I’m planning to have a recording ready to start playing at open mics. From there I’ll see how it’s received and take it further. </p>
<p>So that’s me. I just wanted to let you know what I’ve been up to and see how you’re doing. </p>
<p>Have a great day! 😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😘😘😘 </p>
<p>Sibuor</p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/66699082021-06-25T09:28:02+01:002023-03-08T08:53:50+00:00My Music Story on Q Reviews<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/5db8bad28c880eef8cceeeb002f32efa50bf388d/original/f55bccee-6ce4-409e-9662-4ddb19355ed1-1-201-a.jpeg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJjb250ZW50LnNpdGV6b29nbGUuY29tIn0=/b:W1sic2l6ZSIsIm1lZGl1bSJdXQ==.jpeg" class="size_m justify_right border_none" alt="" /><a contents="Check out my My Music Story piece on the Q Reviews blog." data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.qreview.ca/mymusicstory.html" target="_blank">Check out my My Music Story piece on the Q Reviews blog.</a> I talk about my journey into music, what inspires me, and my vision for my music. </p>Sibuortag:sibuor.com,2005:Post/66699052021-06-25T09:23:31+01:002021-06-25T09:24:59+01:00My first post-lockdown performance<p>so my performance last night went soooooooo well. I’m so happy about it. I’m actually typing this after coming off stage from an impromptu performance in Camden town 😝 </p>
<p>I performed at the 21 June Acoustify open mic night at the Hope & Anchor in Brixton. I played Elton John's "Your Song" and Tori Amos' "Cornflake Girl." I was super nervous but it was a very supportive crowd and I had a great time. Unfortunately my camera didn’t record the video for some reason, argh! At one point I looked up and ther were like four photographers in my face….my megastar moment 😂 here are some of the photos.</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/5b27b42690a8fee9b8378b78ccf3cda7db759242/original/3eebe974-e3f2-4f40-b5da-726188abe24e.jpeg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Never was a cornflake girl!</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/b5d1d34c49e8a2d4a2ce902350d91758b328476c/original/30edf36e-d90e-4680-84e5-89f0de6f957f.jpeg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Thought it was a good solution, hanging with the raisin girls.</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/d03a9c0ee0e02c56137bf314b484d739c5cefe94/original/4cdce63e-7bc2-4331-a944-24c700f33249.jpeg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">And you can tell everybody</p>
<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/259264/7c49dbf2de584813cfc1f223edbd9c64afef2ddd/original/d57971d3-3df9-45ce-ab55-2a64da24a4c6.jpeg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">This is your song.</p>Sibuor